


She Is My Strength

by CommanderEmma, koalabear77



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2015-07-19
Packaged: 2018-03-25 22:31:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3827350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CommanderEmma/pseuds/CommanderEmma, https://archiveofourown.org/users/koalabear77/pseuds/koalabear77
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been two months since Mt. Weather. When Clarke gets a message from a few escaped Mountain Men, she hurries to save Lexa. Will Lexa and Clarke find comfort in each other? Or will their actions push them even further apart?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All creative credit goes to CommanderEmma. This is really all her - I'm just the grammar nazi.
> 
> I don't own any of the characters and whatnot, as you all know.

*2 months after the battle of Mt. Weather*

 

It had been three hours. Three hours of running. Three very long hours worrying about Lexa.

Clarke hadn’t expected the day to end in running, but when she found that letter outside her tent, she knew she had to warn her. Eventually, Clarke saw fire in the distance. The Grounders’ camp, Clarke thought, quickening her stride. 

Bursting through the line of trees, she kept running. She wouldn’t stop until Lexa was safely in her arms. Finally, the large commander’s tent came into view with Indra standing guard as always. 

“I need to see Heda now!” Clarke demanded. Indra looked shocked, too shocked to speak. She simply nodded. Pushing the tent flap back, Clarke entered the well-lit commander’s tent and saw Lexa looking over her maps. 

“Oh my god, you’re ok,” Clarke whispered. She didn’t think it was that loud, but Lexa turned and locked those bright green eyes of hers onto Clarke’s watery blue ones. 

“Clarke,” Lexa breathed. Lexa was sure she was imagining things. She hadn’t seen Clarke since she left her on Mt. Weather, but now the gorgeous blonde who had stolen her heart stood right in front of her. She looked tired, Lexa noted, but also relieved. Lexa was pulled from her thoughts when Clarke spoke again. 

“Some mountain men escaped. They left me a little message threatening to kill you,” she said with a shiver. “I-I just had to make sure you were okay.” 

Lexa was surprised at how worried Clarke was. She had figured that Clarke would never care about her again. Not after what she had done at Mt. Whether. No longer able to handle the distance between them, nor the tears threatening to spill from Clarke’s orbs, Lexa took a few quick strides toward Clarke. Before either one of them could fully process what was happening, Lexa wrapped her arms around her. 

Clarke stood there, shocked. Lexa wasn’t one for physical contact. Clarke recovered quickly, wrapping her own arms around Lexa to pull her in closer. Clarke sighed as Lexa buried her head in her hair. 

“I’m okay” Lexa whispered, barely audible. She continued, “Better now that you’re here, though.” 

Clarke couldn’t hold back her tears any longer. She clung to Lexa as she began to sob uncontrollably. 

As much as Clarke had tried to hate Lexa for leaving her on that mountain, she couldn’t. Especially not after what she had done herself. Lexa was right – she would have taken the deal too. Pulling away from the embrace when her tears finally dried, Clarke looked into the bright green eyes of the girl she had been worried about for the past few hours. “Lexa,” Clarke spoke, breaking the silence. “I understand that you had to make a hard decision – to save your people with as little bloodshed as possible. I forgive you Lexa,” Clarke finished. Lexa couldn’t move. She couldn’t speak. All the hurt, all the regret lifted from her shoulders when Clarke forgave her. “But you’re ok. So, I-uh-I guess I should be going then,” Clarke said as she walked toward the exit. 

“NO!” Lexa all but yelled it. She couldn’t let Clarke get away again. “Stay with me, Sky Princess,” Lexa asked with pleading eyes. “Beja.” It came out more desperate than she may have wanted, but she didn’t care. She just wanted Clarke by her side a little longer. 

Clarke spun back around. “Of course, Heda,” she responded, taking a few steps toward Lexa. Lexa’s face remained stoic, but her eyes showed her confusion at the use of her formal title. Clarke sighed. Finally having a moment to think about something other than Lexa’s safety, she realized just how tired she was. “Lexa, do you mind if I sit down? I pretty much ran the whole way here and I’m a bit tired,” Clarke asked. 

Unsure as to what she should do or say, Lexa offered a small smile. “Of course, Clarke. Feel free to lie down.” Lexa gestured toward her bed positioned in the corner of the tent. 

Clarke nodded and started walking over. She stopped, turning to look back at the commander. “It’s late. Care to join me?” Clarke questioned the brunette carefully. 

Lexa’s breath caught in her throat. “U-uh yeah sure,” she said blushing. Thankfully Clarke didn’t see as she had begun stripping off her dirty cloths. Lexa stood to quickly walk out of the tent, trying to give Clarke some privacy. 

Once outside the tent, Lexa stopped to take a few deep breaths. 

“Heda, are you alright?” Indra asked, looking her commander over for injuries. 

“I’m fine,” Lexa stated, her stoic expression returning easily. “Clarke has had a long journey and needs her rest. Please do not disturb us anymore tonight,” Lexa demanded. 

“Yes Heda,” Indra replied as Lexa retreated into the tent. 

Back inside, Lexa pulled off her armor and removed her weapons, letting them rest on the table. She walked in the direction of her bed and was met by a pair of bright blue eyes. Lexa stipped at a small bowl of water. Using a cloth, she removed the war paint decorating her face. Lexa toed off her heavy boots and slipped out of her jeans. Continuing toward her bed, she pulled off her shirt to reveal a tightly bound chest. She slipped into the other side of the bed, careful to keep some distance between her and Clarke. Lexa rolled onto her side to find blue eyes still watching her every move. She couldn’t help but feel like those eyes were staring straight into her soul. They laid like that for a few a minutes before Clarke fell asleep. Lexa couldn’t help but watch her sleep, watch her chest rise and fall with each breath. Her face looked so innocent without all the stress of the day reflected in it. A strand of golden blonde hair fell into Clarke’s face. Instinctively, Lexa reached out to tuck it behind her ear. She allowed her hand to rest on Clarke’s cheek for a few seconds before pulling her arm back and letting herself fall asleep as well. 

Clarke awoke with a start. She wiped the sleep from her eyes. Looking around she noticed the tent was dark but for a single torch casting a slight glow over where she lay. Just then she heard her name being called in a panicky voice. She turned to see Lexa tossing and turning, sweat beaded on her temples. A nightmare, Clarke thought. Did this happen often? Clarke’s thoughts were interrupted by Lexa calling her name again. 

Clarke took Lexa by her shoulders, shaking her slightly. “Lexa honey,” she called. No response. Clarke tried shaking her again, this time with a little more force. Lexa just continued thrashing. “LEXA!” Clarke finally yelled. Thankfully this finally got through to her, causing her to awaken, her vibrant green eyes full of tears. Lexa couldn’t speak. She simply pulled Clarke tightly against her. Lexa began to run her fingers through Clarke’s blonde curls to make sure it was really her and not Lexa’s imagination playing a cruel trick on her. Clarke held Lexa in her arms, whispering calm reassuring words into her ear. Clarke tried to ignore the tears streaming down the commander’s face, but she couldn’t. Not being able to stop herself, she reached up to brush the tears from Lexa’s eyes. Lexa eventually began to calm down, comforted by Clarke's protective arms. 

When Lexa realized the position they were in, she pulled away. “I-I’m sorry,” Lexa stammered. “That was weak of me,” she continued, turning away. 

Sorrow flashed through Clarke’s eyes. Shaking her head, Clarke cupped Lexa’s cheek gently and turned her head till their eyes locked. “Lexa, you’re not weak. You are the strongest human being I know,” Clarke started, staring deeply into Lexa’s gorgeous green orbs. “With me you don’t have to always be so strong. You can be weak. I will never judge you, Lexa.” Lexa’s eyes shone bright as she looked at Clarke. No thank you’s were needed. They both understood the other perfectly. 

Clarke couldn’t help but lean closer to Lexa, her eyes searching the commander’s face. Lexa closed the distance between them, meeting Clarke’s lips with her own. She brought her hand up to cup Clarke’s face as Clarke tangled her hands in Lexa’s long brown hair. The kiss was slow, passionate, their need for each other apparent. Lexa pushed Clarke back onto the bed, taking control of the kiss. After several long moments, they broke apart in desperate need of oxygen. They laid there, their foreheads pressed together, just staring at each other, memorizing every detail of each other’s face. Clarke yawned, rubbing her eyes, desperately trying to stay awake. 

“Go to sleep, Clarke,” Lexa sighed. “I’ll be here when you wake up.” Clarke smiled, snuggling into Lexa’s toned body. Lexa responded by pulling her slightly closer, kissing her forehead. Lexa waited until she felt Clarke’s breathing slow before whispering into the night, “Ai hod yu in.” Lexa then placed another gentle kiss in Clarke’s hair and finally let herself fall asleep. 

Clarke however lay wide awake. She knew what Lexa had said. She knew what every word meant. She desperately wanted to say it back, but she knew Lexa wasn’t ready to admit it face-to-face. And Clarke was fine with that. She would wait until Lexa was ready. Clarke lay still, listening to the sound of Lexa’s strong heartbeat before whispering into the dark herself, “I love you too, Lexa.” With that, the worn out blonde fell into a peaceful sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning Clarke awoke to an empty bed. She sat straight up and searched the tent looking for Lexa. Not finding her anywhere, Clarke began to breathe rapidly. Her heart began to race. She was in full-on panic mode.

“LEXA!” Clarke finally yelled, her panic taking over the reasoning portion of her brain. Clarke heard heavy footsteps rapidly approaching the tent.

Within seconds, Lexa came running through the tent flap. Her face was stoic but her eyes showed her concern for the blonde. Noticing Clarke’s heavy breathing, Lexa approached slowly and sat on the edge of the bed, never breaking eye contact with Clarke. “What is wrong, Clarke?” Lexa asked.

“I woke up and you weren’t here. I - I thought something happened to you,” Clarke stammered, desperately trying to slow her her breathing.

Lexa smiled slightly. “I am right here. I am ok. I promise.” Lexa said. “ I just sent out a party to find the Mountain Men you talked about.” Lexa continued. She could see Clarke relax slightly as she spoke. “If you would like,” Lexa continued. “I could send someone to Camp Jaha. Tell them you will be staying here for a little bit. Only if you want to, of course.” 

Clarke smiled. “I would like that very much.”

Lexa grinned. “Consider it done, Princess.” Lexa stood as she spoke again. “Get dressed and come join me for breakfast.” With that, Lexa abruptly left the tent.

Clarke yawned as she stood up. She looked around and noticed her clothing was missing, but Lexa had left her a pair of faded blue jeans and a short sleeved grey t-shirt. She quickly got dressed, attaching her gun to her hip before exiting the tent. 

The sun’s blinding rays illuminated the camp. Clarke searched for Lexa. The camp was so full of life - fires roared cooking meats, warriors trained with swords and daggers. Clarke smiled when she found the big tough commander telling stories to a group of children that had gathered near her feet. An empty plate sat beside her on the log. Clarke walked over and sat down next to her. Lexa had just finished telling the children a story of battle when she arrived.

A young girl no more than five years old walked up to Clarke carrying a loaded plate of meat and fruit. “Here, eat something,” her voice shaking as she turned to Lexa to see if her English was correct. Lexa smiled proudly at the girl nodding her head. The girl smiled back brightly.

“Mochof,” Clarke said. The girl smiled again and sat back down with her friends. As Clarke ate, the children played at their feet. Clarke couldn’t help but watch how Lexa interacted with them - showing them the right way to hold their wooden swords, teaching them how to braid their hair in complicated patterns. Clarke was in complete awe of this soft side of the normally ruthless commander. 

The sun was high in the sky when Lexa excused herself and Clarke from the group. Lexa stood to walk toward the treeline, Indra not far behind them. Lexa turned and spoke a few words to Indra before turning back to Clarke.

“You ready?” Lexa questioned.

“Ready for what?” Clarke asked. Lexa smiled at her before heading into the trees. Clarke hurried along behind her as she wove through the trees. “Lexa, where are we going?” Clarke asked again.

Lexa turned to look at her. “A place I spent a great deal of time at when I first took over as Commander.” Lexa spoke.

“Alright then, let’s go” Clarke said. As they walked, Lexa let her gloved hand bump into Clarke’s. Clarke grinned and slipped her hand into Lexa’s. She sighed when Lexa began to trace lazy designs on the back of her hand. 

It only took a few minutes for them to reach a large clearing. Immediately to the right was a decent sized pond, and to the left sat a small cave. A sizeable graveyard was spread out before them. There were thousands of stones lined up in rows that spanned back as far as Clarke could see.

Lexa turned to Clarke. “This is where we pay tribute to all those whom the mountain men took - all those who never came home.” Clarke looked out awestruck. It was all starting to click, why Lexa had taken that deal - they had already lost so many people to that fight. “I have met your mother a few times now,” Lexa spoke again, softly. “I thought it would only be fair that you meet my parents as well.”

And it all made sense. The mountain men had taken Lexa’s parents from her. She couldn’t let that happen to any other child, not if she could do something to save their parents. Clarke turned to Lexa and squeezed her hand. Lexa smiled as she walked forward. Lexa wove around stones till she reached two decent sized ones. Lexa led them close. Sitting down, Clarke ran her hand along the polished material. They sat there for a long time, just listening to the wind ripple through the trees.

Clarke finally broke the silence. “You said you came here a lot. Why?”

Lexa turned to Clarke. “As Commander, I carry the weight of my people with me always. I am expected to be strong, show no weakness. So when things get… difficult, this is a safe haven. No one expects anything of me here; no one is watching to see if I break. I can come here and sit with my parents, tell them everything that is going on, and let them know how much I miss them. I get to let the cracks show a bit here.” When Lexa finished, she had tears in her eyes.

Clarke smiled at her. “Sweety,” she said, taking Lexa’s hands in her own. “You’re not alone anymore. You will always have this place, but you also have me now.” Lexa looked up, locking green eyes on blue.

“And you have me,” she whispered. Clarke smiled, leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Lexa’s lips. They sat there for a while longer before Lexa spoke. “We should head back to camp.” Clarke agreed as they stood up.

Wandering among the trees on their way back, Clarke had fallen a bit behind Lexa in order to allow herself to think. Clarke, unable to hold it back anymore, asked Lexa a burning question. “Lexa what are we?” Lexa stopped dead in her tracks. Her back became rigid. Clarke was afraid she had said the wrong thing and tried again. “I mean, I don’t care. I just don’t wanna mess this up before we even have the chance to get started.”

Lexa turned around. She stared at the ground, not trusting her emotions at the moment. “I wish to be with you. I do. But I am afraid that you are going to get hurt. I am a dangerous person to love. Everyone I care for ends up dead. I cannot let that happen to you.”

Clarke took a few steps closer to Lexa. “I’m not like everyone else. I fell from the sky, remember? I’ve fought like hell to be here with you. I’m not going anywhere.”

Lexa looked up into Clarke’s bright hopeful eyes. “Then I will be yours and you will be mine.” The sound that erupted from Clarke as she threw her arms around Lexa’s neck could only be described as a squeal. Lexa smiled brightly and wrapped her arms around Clarke’s waist, knowing she could get through anything as long as this beautiful girl in her arms was by her side.

______________________________________________________________________ 

 

Back at camp, everything was quiet. Most people had headed to their tents for the night. Lexa pulled Clarke into hers and placed a tentative kiss on her cheek as she lit a few candles.

“Lexa, I’m hungry,” Clarke whined.

Lexa giggled, shaking her head. “Alright Clarke, I shall go find us something to eat.” With that Lexa exited the tent. 

Clarke decided to take the time she had alone to look around the commander’s living quarters. She noticed a framed picture sitting next to Lexa’s bed. Picking it up, she immediately noticed Lexa - a much younger Lexa, but still Lexa. The girl with her had light brown hair and stunning blue-grey eyes. They looked so happy together. 

Lexa walked in carrying two plates of food. Noticing what Clarke was looking at, Lexa quickly sat the plates down. She walked over and stood just feet away from Clarke. “That is Costia,” Lexa said, emotionless.

Clarke looked up, startled by the sudden noise. She smiled when she realized it was Lexa. “You two look really happy,” Clarke observed.

Lexa sighed, “We were. But she never really understood me. She did not understand the decisions I had to make. She wanted me to save everyone, but things do not always work out that way.” Lexa took the picture gently from Clarke before placing it back on the table. 

Clarke took a step closer. “I understand, Lexa. I promise, I do.”

Lexa smiled at her. “Let’s eat, Clarke.” They walked over to the table and dug into their dinner. 

Not long after they finished eating, Indra walked in with a grim expression on her face. “Heda we have located the Mountain Men. They put up quite the fight. We were unable to bring any home alive. They are all dead.” Indra spoke, eyes emotionless, waiting for her commander’s response.

Lexa smiled. “Thank you, Indra. Spread the word. We shall feast tomorrow.” Indra nodded before leaving the tent.

Turning to Lexa, Clarke grinned. “They’re gone. We’re safe.”

Lexa chuckled. “Yes Clarke, It would appear we are safe. For now we will never be totally safe.” Upon hearing those words, Clarke stood and wrapped her arms tightly around Lexa. They stayed like that for several minutes before they heard loud cheers outside. “We should go see what is going on.” Lexa said, turning to leave. Clarke nodded and followed close behind. 

Outside the tent, they saw several fires had been built. Warriors gathered around telling stories of their battle. Having heard of the warriors’ arrival home, many people had left their tents to hear what had become of their enemy. Indra, noticing the two girls appearance, walked toward them. Lexa was the first to speak. “Indra, were there any wounded?”

“Yes, Heda.” Indra replied.

“Thank you. I shall go see how they are doing.” Lexa said stoically. “Clarke, go sit and relax. If we require more healers, I will send for you.” Clarke nodded as Lexa waked away. 

Clarke walked toward a fire that had no one sitting around it. Plopping down, she found herself reflecting on the past 48 hours. Oh, how much her life had changed. Was it really only two days ago that she woke up in Camp Jaha to find that god awful photo? Was it really just two days ago she took off past the gates, not telling anyone where she was going? Not that it mattered. She didn’t feel like she belonged there anymore. Her mother was back in charge. Clarke felt useless now that the war was over. She had left for a little while but went back to Camp Jaha after feeling the loneliness surround her. However when she returned Abby had people watching her every move it was frustrating. She would be lying to herself if she said she hadn’t thought about leaving and joining the grounders before. And now, being with Lexa, she knew it was the right decision for her at this point. It was the best thing for her own happiness to leave Camp Jaha. Maybe even for good. But how do you bring that kind of thing up to the people you love? She knew she cared for Lexa, but when she saw that big red circle around her head she felt like her heart might burst from her chest. And now she was officially dating the Commander of the Tree Clan. Was this even reality? Or would she wake up in her own tent to realize it was all just a dream?

She was pulled from her thoughts when Indra sat down beside her. They sat there for several minutes just watching the fire. Finally, Indra broke the silence. “You care for her, don’t you?” 

Without missing a beat, Clarke responded, “Yes, yes I do. Very much.” 

Indra turned her attention away from the fire. “She’s been hurt a lot. She tries to act like it doesn’t affect her, but she’s still young.” Clarke nodded as Indra continued. “She thinks we will see her as weak if she shows affection toward another. We all care for her and want her to find love. We want her to be happy. And if it is you that makes her happy, do not let her continue to hide it from herself and the world. I see the way she looks at you. She hasn’t looked at anyone like that since - well, since Costia. You mean something to our Heda. You’ve brought her back to life. Don’t let her get away.” 

“I won’t,” Clarke promised. Nodding, Indra stood and walked away. Clarke sat blurry eyed and slightly shocked.

Clarke didn’t know how long she sat there before Lexa appeared at her side. “Clarke, are you ok?” a worried Lexa inquired. 

“Yeah, I was just talking with Indra, that’s all.” 

“What did she say?” Lexa asked. If Indra had said something that upset her princess, she would run her sword through her without a second thought. 

Clarke smiled brightly. “We talked about you, and how you’ve been through a lot. She sees that we care about each other. She said that your people love you and want you to be happy, want you to find love.” Clarke beamed. Lexa shook her head, a tear threatening to fall from her eyes. For once she didn’t hesitate. She leaned in and kissed Clarke sweetly on the lips. 

The whole camp burst into applause. Warriors began to chant, “Heda hon op hod nes!”Clarke and Lexa both smiled as they pulled away from each other. Lexa took Clarke’s hand in hers, holding her close. Turning, they looked out onto the faces of all the smiling grounders. 

Indra’s powerful voice rang out above the cheers. “Heda hon op hod nes - teik oso choj op en drein daun!” The cheers continued as Lexa raised her and Clarke’s conjoined hands. The cheers grew as Lexa and Clarke stared at each other, nothing but love reflecting in their eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Heda hon op hodnes” = “Heda’s found love”   
>  “teik oso choj op en drein daun” = “let us eat and drink”
> 
>  
> 
> A/N   
> Ok that was chapter two you guys. Hope you liked it? Reviews are always welcome! Also, any ideas for future chapters are more than appreciated. Thanks =)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter in honor of the amazing response this small story has gotten and the fact that one Alycia Debnam-Carey is confirmed for season three!!!! Feel free to send feedback. I love to hear from you guys!

The sun was high in the sky as Lexa and Clarke entered the large commander’s tent. Clarke couldn’t help but notice that Lexa had become rather distant in the past few hours. “You ok, lex?” Clarke asked as Lexa began to take off her armor. 

Lexa turned to Clarke, her worry evident in her vibrant green eyes. “I’m so sorry Clarke. I should have asked you before I outed our relationship to the entire camp.”

Clarke smiled at Lexa’s sweetness. “Lexa, I‘m glad everyone knows. I care for you and I want everyone to know that.” Lexa grinned and pulled Clarke in for a well overdue hug. 

“We should try and get some sleep. There will be a big feast tonight in our honor.” Clarke smiled, launching herself onto Lexa’s bed with a sigh. Lexa laughed To Clarke, it was the sweetest sound in the world. 

They both settled into Lexa’s bed. Lexa held Clarke close to her body. It was Clarke who broke the silence. “I don’t want go back to Camp Jaha. I don’t feel like I really belong there anymore.” 

Lexa sighed. “Well, we took in Octavia after the war. I think we are more than capable of taking you in to. But what will your mother think?” 

Clarke turned, looking Lexa directly in the eyes. “Does it look like I care what my mother thinks?” 

Lexa smiled brightly. “Well then, Clarke, you may join the woods clan.” Lexa’s face darkened. “But you should know that by doing so you will not be allowed to see your family or friends unless they come here. But with the alliance failing, it seems unlikely that they would.” 

Clarke smiled. “You are my family, Lexa, and I have a feeling I will be much happier here with you than I’ve ever been. Too many ghosts haunt me at Camp Jaha.”

Lexa beamed. “Then we shall celebrate this too tonight. Now rest. It is going to be a long night.” The both closed their eyes, snuggling into each other’s warm embrace, and fell asleep listening to the sound of the other’s heart beat. 

Lexa was the first to wake up. She smiled at their current position. Clarke clung to her as if she might vanish in the night. Lexa began to draw lazy patterns on Clarke's pale back. Clarke awoke, offering a sleepy smile before sitting up and rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Night had fallen and they could hear the buzz of the camp. Standing, Lexa moved to a stand on the far side of the room. “It would appear that Indra has dropped off your new things.” Clarke stood, moving next to lexa where a similar set of armor hung. It would sit on her shoulders.Where Lexa had red cloth woven into hers, dark blue cloth had been added. “Blue like the sky you fell from to grace my life with beauty.” 

Clarke beamed. “I love it. Will you show me how to put it on?” 

Lexa nodded. “After I braid your hair. It is a sign of my commitment to you that it is braided.” Clarke nodded, moving to sit on the bed while Lexa moved to kneel behind her. Lexa began braiding Clarke’s hair. 

“This all seems a bit much, don’t you think?” Clarke spoke. 

“Perhaps it is,” Lexa hummed. “However it is likely that whoever I date is who I’m likely to bond with, so they treat you well and celebrate you. Also, it’s not everyday that I announce I’m dating one of the Skaikru.” After Lexa finished braiding Clarke’s hair, she proceeded to show her how to properly wear the armor she had been given. Clarke stood tall, allowing Lexa to replace her gun with a more traditional dagger. “Do not worry, Clarke. You will be able to keep it. This dagger just shows your commitment to the clan. I will teach you how to use a sword, and we will go together to have one made just for you once I feel you are ready.” 

Clarke smiled. “So I’m gonna officially become a grounder tonight.” 

Lexa took a half step back and took Clarke’s hands in hers. “Only if you are ready. If you want, we can wait a little bit. I do not want to rush you.” 

Clarke shook her head. she wasn’t used to Lexa being this gentle. “No, I’m ready.” Clarke smiled, kissing Lexa slightly. 

Lexa pulled away. “There is one more thing we must do.” 

“Ok.” Clarke smiled as Lexa continued. 

“You must fill in the bridge of my nose.” Clarke nodded, grabbing the small bowl of war paint Lexa kept on her dresser. Lexa sat down on her throne so Clarke could reach her face more easily. Taking the small brush, she brushed over Lexa’s face. “Thank you, Clarke, for reminding me that it is ok to let my feelings through sometimes.” Clarke smiled down at Lexa. “We should probably go out. We do not want to keep them waiting.” 

Exiting the tent, they were met by Indra and Octavia. Paper lanterns had been hung along with flowers everywhere. Music from the old world hummed through the speakers Octavia had set up. “It’s beautiful,” Clarke whispered. 

“Just wait and see. You’re gonna love it.” Octavia smiled. “And how could you not tell me you were here? Let alone dating the commander!” Octavia whispered excitedly to Clarke as they headed toward the main part of the camp. 

“Because it’s all happened very fast and I didn’t know where you were I’m sorry. Can I make it up to you by telling you I’m also joining the grounders officially tonight?” Octavia jumped up, hugging Clarke. Lexa glared at their display of public affection but let it slide when she saw how happy Clarke looked. 

“Oh my god this is gonna be amazing to have you here!” Clarke smiled, pulling away from Octavia. 

Lexa interrupted. “Hate to break up the party, but we are getting closer to the feast, and it would only make sense for Clarke to be close to me.” 

“Of course, Heda.” Octavia moved back next to Indra. 

Lexa led Clarke to a table raised slightly above the others. Indra took the seat on the other side of Lexa, and Octavia sat next to Clarke. The other grounders had gathered at round tables around them. Candles flickered. A large space was left open near them. Wooden blankets had been placed to form a dance floor. Surrounding the outskirts were fires with various meats cooking. Indra and Octavia stood, moving to cut meat onto plates. 

“They get our food for us. It is strange, I know, but it is tradition.” Clarke nodded. Lexa stood, and the crowd became silent. “I would like to thank you all for the food and decorations. It looks amazing. As you know, Clarke and I are now dating.” The crowed roared chanting their names. “However, this is not just a celebration of our commitment. Clarke has agreed to permanently join the Trigedakru!” The crowd roared. The sound was deafening. Clarke grinned at the realization that these people cared about her and were happy to have her. Lexa sat down, gently taking Clarke's hand. The crowd continued to cheer as the pair looked at each other, and for the first time in Clarke’s life she felt at home. Indra and Octavia returned with their food. The plates were towered high. Lexa smiled, taking a bite which signaled to everyone else that they could eat. 

Later on in the night, most of the younger people had made their way onto the dance floor. Clarke turned to look at Lexa whose eyes were bright, and she seemed happy watching the children dance. “Look at those two,” Lexa whispered, pointing out a pair of children dancing together. Arm in arm, they moved in sync to the music. “They're so cute. They actually look somewhat like a younger version of us.” 

Clarke nodded. “They kinda do.” 

As the first rays of light began to rise, Lexa gently took Clarke's hand and led her to their tent. “We should try and rest for a few hours, and then we will go to Camp Jaha to see your family and friends and pick up any of your things you might like.” Clarke nodded, climbing carefully into bed and falling quickly asleep. Lexa plopped down into her throne. She was worried that Clarke’s friends would try to convince her to stay. She couldn’t lose her again. It would tear her apart. She decided sitting here wouldn’t help, so she headed out to ready her horse. 

“Clarke, time to wake up.” Clarke mumbled something about paint before opening her eyes. “Ugh, I don’t wanna deal with my mother. I just wanna get my stuff and leave.” 

Lexa nodded. “Ok babe, we will grab your things and leave.” Leaving the tent, Lexa mounted her pure white horse and helped Clarke mount behind her. 

It wasn’t a long ride to Camp Jaha. Clarke headed straight for her tent. Lexa following close behind. Upon entering, Clarke pulled out a backpack from under her bed, moving to place her sketch books and charcoal pack into her bag along with a watch from her father and some of her clothing. Just as Clarke turned to leave, Abby walked into the tent. 

“Where do you think you’re going?!” Abby demanded. 

“I’m going home,” Clarke said, pushing past her mother with Lexa following. 

“But this is your home, Clarke.” 

Clarke turned, fury in her eyes. “This has never been my home. You locked me up on the arc. You were the reason my father was killed. I saved all your lives, and you say thank you by sticking guards on me to watch my every move. I’m going home with the grounders!” Abby stood, shocked at her daughter's outburst. Clarke moved to talk to Bellamy and Raven. “Hey guys. I don’t have a ton of time to explain, but I’m leaving. It’s too hard being here. Too much pain is associated with this place.” 

“We completely understand, Clarke. Out of all of us, you deserve to be happy,” Raven assured her. 

“Yeah, just be careful.” Bellamy added. 

Just then, Lexa moved to place her hand on the small of Clarke’s back. “You two are more then welcome to come to the camp and see Clarke whenever you want. You are always welcome among the grounders.” Raven and Bellamy smiled. 

Clarke took her time giving each of her friends a hug, whispering, “May we meet again,” as she went. Lasty, she turned to her mother. “Goodbye, Chancellor.” Lexa remounted her horse, once again helping Clarke up and mentally adding riding lessons to the list of things Clarke should learn. Turning the horse swiftly, she began to lead Clarke back to the grounders’ camp which was now both their homes. 

Returning to the camp, Clarke asked Lexa a rather simple question. “Am I staying with you or getting my own tent?” 

Lexa chuckled. “Well, which do you prefer?” 

“I don’t mind, however I wouldn’t mind staying with you.” 

Lexa grinned. “I was hoping you would say that, because even though it has only been a few days, I do not think I can go back to sleeping without you.” 

Clarke smiled. “Well then, I’ll stay with you.” 

Arriving at their tent, Clarke began to unpack some of her things. She pulled out a sketchbook and lay it on the bed. “Lexa, where can I put my clothing?”

“Oh here, I had another chest brought in for you to put clothing in and a smaller chest for your art supplies,” Lexa said, pointing to said items. 

“I thought you didn’t know were I was staying?” Clarke asked. 

“Well I didn’t, but I hoped it was with me, so I just, uh, went for it.” 

Clarke laughed. “Ok, Lexa.” 

As Clarke began to put her clothing away and look at some of the clothing that had been left for her, Lexa took it upon herself to flip through Clarke’s sketchbook. Lexa smiled as she saw that page after page was filled of her and Clarke and some of the other grounders. 

“You like them?” Clarke asked. 

“Yeah. You capture something I have never seen in myself before.” 

Clarke smiled. “I draw to relax, and I’ve always drawn what I’ve wanted most. I normally do it subconsciously. So I guess, perhaps I knew what I wanted all along.” 

Lexa leaned over and kissed Clarke. “I’m glad you're here. I missed you so much. I thought you would never want to see me again after...” 

Clarke took Lexa’s hand and interrupted her. “Let’s not dwell on the past now and just enjoy each other.”

“That I can do,” Lexa whispered. She leaned in and kissed Clarke on the lips.

**Author's Note:**

> Ai hod yu in - I love you


End file.
